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Casia Chancellor was found with the Grim Reaper standing over her close to graduation by her housemates. Cause of death was suspected to be starvation. Amidst the crying, Casia's fiance Armando Smith, pleaded with the Grim Reaper to spare her life.
"I was terrified when he made me try and guess which hand he held the shining blue orb in," said Armando. "Fortunately, I picked the right one, and Casia was restored to life. This was the most seriously coolest moment in my entire life."
"Dude! I got to look into the jaws of death and come out alive!" Casia added. "It was awesome. Can I do it again?"
Housemates Isaac Chancellor, and his fiancee Stephanie Walker, were a lot more shaken up by the experience.
"I'm glad that Casia is still alive, but I wish they would treat this experience as it is: a near tragedy, not a ride at an amusement park," Isaac said.
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Armando pleads with the Grim Reaper
Isaac and Stephanie were working on Stephanie's art class assignment when the Grim Reaper showed up. The above photo was in fact, taken by accident.
"I was so surprised when I was developing the negatives and this one came out," said Stephanie. "No one believed us until I could produce this photo and the unaltered negative."
Vic Chancellor
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Welcome to a new, green Rainbow Valley!
Well, we've had marriages galore, and more children in the neighbourhood to boot. I'm sure I'm not the only one who is thrilled to see their first grandchildren.
On top of that, we've also had a new Gardening Club open.
Nicholas Wilson, leading natural scientist, has come across an amazing discovery that all residents of Rainbow Valley should be most interested in. I know that for many of us anything involving biology brings up bad memories of being in the lab, but it is worth mentioning that seeing our very own DNA appear in our children is proof enough that we have not completely escaped. Believe me, it's well worth the read.
There are no classifieds this issue as none were placed.
Vic Chancellor
Editor in Chief
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Zuchini juice may be the key to prolonging life in Rainbow Valley.
While in the labs, the scientist infected their prisoners with a specially designed virus, intended to stop their bodies from rejecting the various changes to their DNA. While this virus is not otherwise harmful, it does have a fondness for zuchini juice!
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For some reason, still being researched by leading natural scientist Nicholas Wilson, the consumption of zuchini juice causes the virus to go into overload. Instead of merely regenerating deteriorating cells, it also rejuvinates cells that are otherwise completely fine, effectively reversing the aging process!
Additionally, this virus is in some respects a WooHooily Transmitted Disease (WHTD): your partners and your children will be infected, therefore
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they too will be able to extend their lives with zuchini juice.
Further research is being conducted into this virus and zuchini juice to determine the extent of it, and also any ill effects there may be. Anyone interested in contributing, please call Nicholas Wilson on 052009.
Anna D'Beau
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