HR jokes, made during the course of RPing. Usually when discussing plots... or when we're tempted to have our characters say something that they wouldn't say, hehehe.
Zac: Hey, Faith, I gotta tell you something
Faith: Someone else is pregnant?
Zac: Actually no, I just came down to tell you that you're out of shampoo
Zac: Faith, I have to tell you something.
Faith: Okay who did you impregnate this time?
Zac: Mmm... well, actually it's more like a what - the upstairs bathroom is clogged - you need to call a plumber
Faith: Oh God, Zac, I can't leave you alone anymore, can I?
Zac: mmm... nope *wiggles eyebrows and grins cheeikly*
Faith: Let's get this straight, you can impregnate 3000 girls and a drain, but not me? My life sucks!
Zac: Uh, Faith...
Faith: Who is she?
Zac: Ok, I swear, all I did was say hi, and now she's pregnant! I'm getting more and more fertile!
Faith: Okay, Dez
Zac: check
Faith: Nyx
Zac: Check
Faith: Julie
Zac: double check
Faith: the drain
Zac: *looks embarrassed* check
Faith: Me
Zac: Half check
Faith: Zada
Zac: sorta check...
Faith: Rachel
Zac: Check
Faith: Kate
Zac: Che
Faith: Che?
Zac: It was THAT fast...
Faith: Shannon
Zac: Check
Faith: Alexa
Zac: double triple check
Faith: mystery girl who doesn't even exist yet
Zac: that's an enigma...
Come to a hanson concert, get an autograph and get preggers!
Faith: Ok, so let's get this straight... you went out tonight, and you didn't get ANYONE pregnant?
Zac: Yeah
Faith: *faints*
Faith: Zac, what do you mean you don't want to sleep with me tonight?
Zac: I'm sorry... I'm just really tired...
Faith: That's it, Zac, it's over
Faith: Zac, I have bad news, I can't have any more children
Zac: What?! That's it! We're over
Faith: But you have like 10000 kids!
Zac: Yeah, but none of them are yours!
Faith: Honestly, I think we could pretend
Zac: We can't pretend
Zac: how am I supposed to be accused of favourtisim if none of them are yours?
Faith: Oh pick a child with brown hair, pretend it's mine
Zac: It's just not the same
Faith: Zac, no one will know the truth except you or me... I'll even give this kid a tattoo like mine
Zac: is that legal?
Faith: I'm a maverick, Zac, I don't follow your rules and conventions
Zac: Oh wait, I've been havign kids at 17... who am I to talk about what's legal...
Faith: I think we have to end this, Zac... I can't live in a house with 2908080942342342389 babies... I'm going insane... especially when more arrive everyday
Beware of women who sing "All I wanna do is make love to you" (by Heart) to Zac
Zac's most often utter quote on Fathers Day: Next!
About 5 kids at once: Daddy, it's our birthday
Zac: Oh God, more birthdays to remember
Faith: Zac?
Zac: Yeah?
Faith: I'm pregnant
Zac: Really? Yay!
Faith: but not to you
Zac: but... i... im so fertile!
Zac: How could I go wrong with my fertility? *gets down on hands and knees* WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!
Tabloid headline: "I'm the only woman in the world never to have a child by Zac - and I'm his girlfriend"
Faith drags herself home, half dead.
Zac: Oh hi, you're home. How was work?
Faith: oh same old, same old
Faith: what did you do today?
Zac: got someone preggers
Faith: same as usual then
Zac: yeah, what about you?
Faith: got tortured
Zac: same as usual too...
Faith: its nice that we have a routine
Zac: Hey, Faithy, I have an idea
Faith: Yeah?
Zac: how about we switch places for a day?
Faith: So I go around getting people pregnant and you get tortured?
Zac: Yeah
Faith: that would be cool, but I don't think Nature's on our side
Zac: damn...
Faith: Yeah, i was looking forward to knocking up chicks
Zac: This is the third time this week you've come home in this state
Faith: I thought it was the fourth time
Zac: That's even worse! I think you should demand a pay rise
Faith: We wouldn't need more money if you didn't have to spend so much on raising all them kids of yours...
Faith: so what are your plans for tonight?
Zac: I'm going to get someone pregnant
Faith: Don't lie to me! You're doing a concert tonight aren't you?
Zac: What did you do tonight?
Faith: Uh... got tortured...
Zac: *gives her the once over* You're not injured at all! You went to P3, didn't you?
Faith: Come Zac, we must prepare for tomorrow night
Zac: Why Faith? What are we going to do tomorrow night?
Faith: The same thing we do every night Zac
Faith: You got plans for tonight?
Zac: Oh, might get someone preggers
Faith: After that, wanna catch a movie?
Faith and Zac decided to combine talents and start a shop speciallising in getting pregnant through torture
Faith and Zac, the travelling tortured pregnant people
If Zac is synonymous with sex, does that mean Faith is synonymous with torture?
Summing up Zac and Faith's marriage in one word: Bondage
Faith: Zac? Can you do me a favour?
Zac: Sure, anything
Faith: See, I haven't been tortured today and it's beginning to bother me. Would you mind?
Faith: Dammit Zac, I'm begging you, tie me up
Zac: well... you dont have to tell me twice
*in the midst of sex*
Faith: hurt me
Zac: what?
Faith: hurt me!
Zac: well you don't have to tell me twice... well actually you did, but nevermind
Zac: Faith! I think I've finally figured out why you haven't carried any kids of mine to term yet!
Faith: Oh?
Zac: All that torture is making you miscarry
Zac: Faith, you've been crying, what's wrong?
Faith: I wasn't tortured today and I don't know how to handle it
Zac: Wait.. you were the reson Faith went evil?
Kate: Yeah, that was me
Zac: Thank you! That was the best sex ever
Ness: I want to toture Faith
Chelle: *yawn* mmmhmmm
Not even magical birth control could stand against the power of Zac's fertility
Jess: Wait let me get this straight... you had sex with Zac?
Rach: Ummm yep...
Jess: As in, my brother Zac
Rach: Yessss
Jess: EWWWWWW
Julie: great view
Bobby: *looking at julie* yeah
Julie: *noticing Bobby looking at her* I meant, like the city
Bobby: oh yeah... i meant myself
Zac: so you're having Xander's baby, you slut
Faith: screw you, asshole... dammit, i've missed this
Zac: so have i
Faith: my relationship with xander is too nice... i need fighting
Faith: uh zac
Zac: yeah?
Faith: im pregnant to you
Zac: but we havent... technically... had sex in over 2 months
Faith: uh...
Zac: dont tell me those dreams
Faith: hey we both knew you were fertile
Zac: oh gosh, apparently even dream me is fertile
"Is an apocoalyse coming?"
"Umm... lemme just check the calander..."
"If pregnancy is a sexually transmitted disease, Zac must be a carrier"
Gwen: Where shall we have sex today?
Mordred: Umm... Uluru?
Gwen: No, done that already
Morded: Empire state building?
Gwen: five times already
Hours later:
Morded: I know! The sewers!
Gwen: I am so not doing that again. Those alligators cramp my style.
More hours later:
Morded: I'm beginning to think we've done everywhere already
Gwen: You sure?
Mordred: Well, where haven't we been?
*Long silence*
Hours later, still silence
Still more hours later:
Mordred: How about a canoe in the middle of a whirlpool?
Gwen: Hmm, prospects! So all we have to do is find a canoe and a whirlpool
Rachel: You cheated on me! Why? Zac: Don't blame me! It's was Faith's fault! She made me!
Rogue: I feel like being destructive today. Calvin!
Rogue: I feel like being destructive... excuse me while I switch personalities.
zac: im getting married
tay: *faints*
zac: oh his corsets too tight again
Things We Can Learn From Bobby and Julie
1. Don't get caught fingering in class.
2. Don't get caught having sex at the school dance.
3. Don't get your tongue ring caught in a Prince Albert
Micah: Aw man, I was hitting on a LESBIAN? That sucks.
Julie: No she's not a lesbian. She just doesn't like guys touching her.
Micah: I fail to see the distinction
Julie: Well it's like this *pause* actually, I fail to see the distinction too...
Saku: By the way, have I ever mentioned that I'm only 2?
Trina: Hmm... guess that makes me a cradle robber
Amber: Or something worse... starting with 'P'