5 October 2007

Nerdfest

Written by AiMsTeR and Nessa

IM - Sam and Faith

The Cursed One says:

...Why are you online?

Firecracker says:

hey dorkus malorkus I'm bored. SOMEONE isn't paying attention to me

The Cursed One says:

Oh no.
Such a shame.

Firecracker says:

Yeah, I think so

The Cursed One says:

Dean is paying attention...

Firecracker says:

That's because I am wearing shorts

The Cursed One says:

No, I think that hint was to go get food. He hasn't eaten since lunch, it could get dangerous.

Firecracker says:

Off you pop then

The Cursed One says:

...Nah. I'm not the one that has to put up with him anyway. : )

Firecracker says:

I'll bend over. That will get him off my case

The Cursed One says:

I doubt it.
See? Now you're encouraging him.

Firecracker says:

I am doing nothing of the sort. It's my chest. It's working against me

The Cursed One says:

Sure.

Firecracker says:

They have a mind of their own So, dorkface, you looking up porn?

The Cursed One says:

No, I'm researching. There's enough porn on here from Dean's useage.

Firecracker says:

Yeh, but don't you have different taste in porn?

The Cursed One says:

What do you mean?

Firecracker says:

Well, I don't like Dean's porn. He's all into the Asians, but I'd rather look at ... well, let's not delve into what I look at But it's different to what Dean looks at Some of it...

The Cursed One says:

...Right.

Firecracker says:

You should find your niche of porn, Sam. It's very important Also, smack Dean for me

The Cursed One says:

Ok.

Firecracker says:

Thanks handsome

The Cursed One says:

But no, I don't think porn is important.
Not when you're spoken for, anyway. : )

Firecracker says:

Sucking up?

The Cursed One says:

I don't suck up.
Unless I'm on a case.

Firecracker says:

Are we working on anything that is going to require me to put pants on?

The Cursed One says:

Not for a while at least.
You're good to be pantsless.

Firecracker says:

Awesome. But probably not around Dean

The Cursed One says:

I'm sure he won't mind.

Firecracker says:

But won't you mind?

The Cursed One says:

It's not like you haven't done it before.

Firecracker says:

True. But I do feel bad. I don't want you to be all iffy about Dean watching me wander around pantsless

The Cursed One says:

In all honesty, I think he's used to it by now. Sometimes he hardly notices. And besides, he only does it to annoy me.

Firecracker says:

Alright. Good. I don't really enjoy wearing clothes
I think I could become a nudist

The Cursed One says:

Which works in my favor. : )

Firecracker says:

I've noticed

The Cursed One says:

Really?
I'm that transparent?

Firecracker says:

I've seen you checking me out, you big perve

The Cursed One says:

Damnit.
I will try harder.

Firecracker says:

I bet

The Cursed One says:

...Harder. : )

Firecracker says:

You never used to be this dirty

The Cursed One says:

What can I say, I've had a good tutor.

Firecracker says:

Yeah, Dean does a good job

The Cursed One says:

Dean does a terrible job.
If he was responsible, it took 24 years.

Firecracker says:

Maybe you're just a slow learner?

The Cursed One says:

Oh thanks.

Firecracker says:

Oh shut up, dorkface, you know I don't mean it
Maybe I'm just trying to make you angry, because according to Chantelle's journal - "the sex is always better when you're mad at me"

The Cursed One says:

She updated again?
Link me.

Firecracker says:

Didn't I bookmark it on your laptop?

The Cursed One says:

Wait a moment...
Ok found it.
Oh wow.

Firecracker says:

PS. I am, in no way, checking you out right now

The Cursed One says:

I'm reading pathetic love stories about my brother and you're checking me out?

Firecracker says:

Yes. I mean, no

The Cursed One says:

Right.

Firecracker says:

You're nice to look at, is that a crime? I mean, I am also thinking of new ways to violate you

The Cursed One says:

Oh really? And would I actually enjoy any of those?

Firecracker says:

I think so

The Cursed One says:

You think?

Firecracker says:

I know
It does involve my flexibility

The Cursed One says:

Maybe I will like it then. : )

Firecracker says:

: ) I hope so So, loserface, what's with the sn?

The Cursed One says:

Ah... I've had it for a few years.
And you know what's with it, why?

Firecracker says:

It's just a little emo, my friend
Should I get some eyeliner for you?
: )

The Cursed One says:

What has being cursed with demon blood got to do with eyeliner?

The Badass One says:

Better?

Firecracker says:

Hahaha ummm
Yeah, I guess?

The Badass One says:

Not naming anyone in comparison.
But I'm not changing it again.

Firecracker says:

You're more badass than me
I am a lovely young lady who plays well with the other children

The Badass One says:

Oh yeah, definitely.
And I'm not rolling my eyes at all.
You didn't see that!
Where did Dean go anyway?

Firecracker says:

Bathroom?

The Badass One says:

Ah. I didn't see him leave.
That was sneaky.

Firecracker says:

He smacked me on the ass as he went past. So I noticed

The Badass One says:

Oh ok.

Firecracker says:

Yeah, he has the "sexually harrass Faith and run" thing down pat

The Badass One says:

He's had practise.
Lots and lots of practise.

Firecracker says:

Samwise?

The Badass One says:

WHat?

Firecracker says:

I think you should come over and kiss me for a second

The Badass One says:

...Why?

Firecracker says:

Well, that reaction doesn't exactly make me feel loved

The Badass One says:

Awwww. Poor Faithy.

Firecracker says:

Ugh, don't call me that : (

The Badass One says:

Ok. Poor Stupid. : )

Firecracker says:

Haha, ok, I'll put up with that

The Badass One says:

Mrs Stupid Loserface.

Firecracker says:

Mrs?

The Badass One says:

Well, you call me Loserface, so technically...

Firecracker says:

Technically we're married?
I think we qualify as a defacto couple

The Badass One says:

Well no.
Maybe.
But, it fits, go with me.

Firecracker says:

Hmm, do we get benefits from that?

The Badass One says:

Always.

Firecracker says:

So dirty these days

The Badass One says:

Just stating facts...

Firecracker says:

You're hot
I am also stating facts

The Badass One says:

Then it's a fact. : )

Firecracker says:

Exactly

The Badass One says:

Maybe we should have a cold shower.

Firecracker says:

Maybe we should : ) Though, is Dean still stinking it up in there?

The Badass One says:

Sounds like he's in the shower.
Damn.

Firecracker says:

Boo. Hiss
Hey, did I tell you that the sperm donor/my father called Tru the other week?

The Badass One says:

No?

Firecracker says:

Oh, yeah, she called me, slightly upset over it. He's trying to play the "you're my granddaughter" card

The Badass One says:

Sorry, didn't realise this conversation was 'internet exclusive'. Are we not talking out loud for a reason? : P
So as I asked, why?

Firecracker says:

Haha, sorry, am listening to a podcast as well I'm not sure. He's trying this whole "we're a family" thing lately. I haven't been asnwering his calls, and then his son managed to track me down and did this whole "we're family, we should get to know each other" thing

The Badass One says:

...Wow. So why wait this long? Something's not right.

Firecracker says:

That's what I asked, and no one could give me an answer I told Tru if she wanted to get to know them, she shouldn't let me influence her. But she should just be careful. She doesn't appear to be interested though

The Badass One says:

It's a bit odd and out of the blue. I wouldn't trust innocent motive.

Firecracker says:

Yeah, well, I had no real intention to get to know them anyway. I mean, he had like 10 years to come rescue me from my hellish childhood. And he didn't

The Badass One says:

Exactly.

Firecracker says:

So, I don't see the point in him having the right to being my family

The Badass One says:

Family isn't blood.

Firecracker says:

I have your loserface, Tru, Angel and co... and Dean. So I think I'm set in family stakes these days

The Badass One says:

Speaking of, 'it emerges'.
Must have been in the shower, his hair's wet.

Firecracker says:

Probably spanking it

The Badass One says:

Probably.

Firecracker says:

Do you do it in the shower? Oh sorry, when you did it, did you do it in the shower? I always think it makes the most sense to do it there. Easy to clean

The Badass One says:

...True.

Firecracker says:

I used to keep a plastic chair in my shower so I could do it there
Granted, I don't make as much mess as you guys

The Badass One says:

I didn't think girls made mess.
Except on their hands, I guess.

Firecracker says:

Yeah. Plus, the shower blocks out noise
Although, have I shown you my party trick yet?

The Badass One says:

Which one?

Firecracker says:

I think I showed Dean once
The way I can get myself off by just clenching and unclenching muscles down there

The Badass One says:

...You've never needed to show me that.

Firecracker says:

Very true : ) You do a great job helping me rocket off

The Badass One says:

I like to think so. : )

Firecracker says:

Pat yourself on the back : P
Hey! Did you just hear what Dean said? Smack him for me, please

The Badass One says:

Smack him yourself!

Firecracker says:

Fine
Hey, look at me for a second, before Dean notices I am flashing you

The Badass One says:

Hahaha I think he noticed.
You can tell by the begging for more.

Firecracker says:

Haha yeah

The Badass One says:

It's kind of sad, really.

Firecracker says:

Hey, they'e nice to look at
As Spike always tells me they are "a rack to write home about"

The Badass One says:

Yeah, but Dean's seen them plenty of times already. You'd think he'd have them memorised well enough to not have to refresh as often as Windows Explorer.

Firecracker says:

By the same token, shouldn't you have them memorised also? I suspect you like refreshing

The Badass One says:

Well yeah, but I don't have to ask for them either.

Firecracker says:

That's true. You do get to look and touch whenever you want

The Badass One says:

: )

Firecracker says:

The day gravity catches up to me will be sad, I think

The Badass One says:

It will be a tragedy to befold any other.
But hey, it probably won't happen before the apocalypse if that makes you feel better.

Firecracker says:

That does. At least I'll die hot

The Badass One says:

There you go.
And apparently, so will I. : )

Firecracker says:

We make quite the pair

The Badass One says:

We do.
If there was ever too much hot, it would be us.

Firecracker says:

Definitely. We're like an explosion of hotness No wonder we're so good at kicking ass
We lull people into a false sense of security and then BAM. Hot person fighting

The Badass One says:

That must be it.

Firecracker says:

Yeah, hot people don't actually need talents. But we're pretty good

The Badass One says:

We've overstepped the expectations that humanity had of us.

Firecracker says:

Exactly
What left do we have to achieve?

The Badass One says:

I don't know.
I guess we can die accomplished...

Firecracker says:

Weight off my shoulders
Question: Do you like this bra?

The Badass One says:

I think I prefer the black and white one still, but yeah.

Firecracker says:

Hmm... I'm going to replace some of my lingerie

The Badass One says:

I think you should get rid of the pink and yellow set.

Firecracker says:

Haha, you hate that set

The Badass One says:

I did actually use to like it, but now not so much.
I guess I've just seen better. : )

Firecracker says:

I'm looking online. I'll email you the site
Get it?

The Badass One says:

...Yeah.
Opening now.

Firecracker says:

Cordy has an account on this site. So I'll order it on that, and she'll have someone teleport it out to me

The Badass One says:

Are you in the new archives?

Firecracker says:

Yes

The Badass One says:

Page 3, 7th one down, the red one.
Get that set. : )
Oh and the green one on page 4, 2nd down.

Firecracker says:

Why don't you pick them out and I'll order them
Otherwise they'll all be black

The Badass One says:

I don't mind black. : )

Firecracker says:

You don't mind as long as they come off easily?

The Badass One says:

I don't mind the aesthetics of black.

Firecracker says:

Black is practical

The Badass One says:

Page 11, 5th down. That's half black.

Firecracker says:

Yeah, I looked at that one, but I didn't know if the metal ring on the underwear would be too cold
Like, when you first put it in. It does sit in my crack, after all Put it on, I mean. Not "in"

The Badass One says:

Just rub it between your hands for a bit, or don't wear it in cold weather. It looks like it might shrink anyway...
There's a blue set on page 12, 7th down.

Firecracker says:

I like the lace detailing on that one

The Badass One says:

But I think that's about it for my preferences. : )

Firecracker says:

Alright, I'll order those and a few other surprises : )

The Badass One says:

Ok.

Firecracker says:

I get Halloween off. So I'm so dressing up and eating candy

The Badass One says:

Off?

Firecracker says:

Yeah, no patrolling. Vamps don't go out on Halloween

The Badass One says:

Fair enough.

Firecracker says:

So I'm going to OD on candy
Which probably means I'll be fighting Dean for it

The Badass One says:

Dean will no doubt join you, he did last year.
Yeah.

Firecracker says:

Oh, maybe we should make our poptart concoction...
I'm going to crack out a slutty costume for the event

The Badass One says:

You've got my vote. : )

Firecracker says:

Any requests?

The Badass One says:

Just don't expect anything from me in the same department.
No, no, up to you.

Firecracker says:

I'll ask Dean
... Whoa, little excited

The Badass One says:

I did say you, Dean didn't come into the exation.
equation, I meant.

Firecracker says:

Haha, I think Buzz Lightyear is a better costume

The Badass One says:

I think Dean's overtired.
Oh good, he's going for food.
About time.

Firecracker says:

I knew he'd crack eventually
If we send him out for something that will take a bit longer to cook, reckon we can squeeze in a quickie?

The Badass One says:

Nah. Dean takes his food too seriously.
And besides, he's gone already.

Firecracker says:

He moves like the flash when he wants to
Ok, ordered lingerie. Also, hilarious that I know Angel's credit card details off by heart

The Badass One says:

Maybe I'll have to take advantage of that one day. : )

Firecracker says:

: ) Well, Wolfram and Hart can afford it

The Badass One says:

True that.

Firecracker says:

I didn't tell you this morning, but I had a really good dream about you last night

The Badass One says:

Oh yeah? Do tell.

Firecracker says:

It involved you. Naked. And me. Naked

The Badass One says:

Which is usually a good thing...

Firecracker says:

And oil

The Badass One says:

...Oil?

Firecracker says:

Yeah, massage oil

The Badass One says:

Sounds creative.

Firecracker says:

Yeah. Suffice to say, woke up a little sad that it had only been a dream

The Badass One says:

I'm a little scared right now.

Firecracker says:

Is it because you're listening to Britney?>

The Badass One says:

What?
I'm a little freaked at the oil prospect.
Sounds... uncomfortable.
You know the ideas sound fun, but executing it is another thing entirely.

Firecracker says:

Don't you trust me?
I promise not to insert anything into anywhere unless you want me too : )
Will it make you feel less scared if I admit something incredibly girly to you?

The Badass One says:

I think that depends what it is.

Firecracker says:

Something that will make you all gooey

The Badass One says:

It would have to be pretty goo-worthy.

Firecracker says:

It makes me ashamed to be a girl

The Badass One says:

I'm intrigued.

Firecracker says:

Ok, so I had to name this laptop when I set it up, right?

The Badass One says:

Right...

Firecracker says:

I named it Sasquatch

The Badass One says:

Sasquatch? Why?

Firecracker says:

Because you are a sasquatch

The Badass One says:

But that's Dean's nickname for me, not yours...

Firecracker says:

Yeah I know, but I think it's hilarious
Plus, Jumbo just sounded dirty
Speaking of nicknames, how do you put up with all of the stupid ones I give you?

The Badass One says:

How do you put up with my retaliations?

Firecracker says:

THe sex makes it worth it

The Badass One says:

There you go.
Dean's back, I can hear the car.

Firecracker says:

Woohoo, food
But seriously, if someone was calling me stpid variations of my name, it would make me hit them

The Badass One says:

I do hit you. : )

Firecracker says:

Haha
So do the Samwise's and the Sammich's and the Sammachu's annoy you?

The Badass One says:

No, I've had much worse over the years.
Ok I can smell the food, so I'm getting off the computer now.
Goodbye online-Faith. : )

Firecracker says:

Goodbye online-Sam

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