30 April 2004 - When you just can't do it anymore

Octavian & Logan

Octavian walked back into the mansion, arms clasped tight around his chest. He barely responded to anyone as he went up to his room, keeping the too familair sickness down until he could throw up in the privacy of his room.

He swallowed slightly, feeling the whatever it was his father had injected him with to ensure his submission still floating through his system. He knew, suddenly, that he just couldn't do this anymore. He was too tired of everything.

So, he sat down at his desk to write letters to finish up his affairs. Letters for the people he felt needed it. Documentation that he had been gathering to be sent to the authorities, so at least of his father would never be punished for what he did to him, he would be arrested for unethical business dealings, tax fraud, insurance fraud and embezzlement.

He left a stack of sealed envelopes neatly on his desk, each with the names of the people they were meant to go to written in his neat, elegant handwriting.

The Letters

Demetria, my darling sister
I'm sorry that I'm leaving you, Dem. I love you. You're the only good thing that came out of living with our parents. You're the better half of both of us You always were. Don't blame yourself for this, and I know you will, mum. There wasn't anything you could do. This is my choice. I'm tired, Dem. Just so very, very tired. So I've decided to bow out and get some rest. Look after Jubes for me, will you? She won't understand. But I guess you don't either. I'm sorry, Dem, but I just can't live anymore. I'm weary and soulsick, and now I'm just going to sleep. To sleep, perchance to dream. Good dreams, I hope. I've had too many nightmares. I want you to have my books and my will is lodged with different lawyers then our family ones. A little firm called Fabius and Sons. Their address can be found in my address book. Look after yourself, live gloriously and marry for love. Get away from our parents when you're 18 and stay away. Hope your acting career goes well.
With love always and forever,
Octavian.

To the Wolf and the Angelic Artist,
Guess this will come as a bit of a shock, really. We had some good times together, the four of us. The Mavericks. Terror of London and all sane people everywhere. I do miss it, but that is not why I've done this. Don't kill anyone, Mordred. No slaughter. Look after Gwen and your children. And don't you dare try and protest what I've given you in my will. It's nowhere near how much I should give either of you. Mordred, you might want to delete those pictures Gwen gave me off off my computer before Jubilee gets to it. Vort, I will always treasure the relationship we had. Is is one of my dearest memories. And tell Spike to relax, I have no plans to come back and claim you. You were always so understanding, Vortigern. Something I loved about you. Please try and understand this. Why I have to. The two of you are my dearest friends. Please look after Demetria for me and make sure she doesn't do anything too stupid. Get the professor to bind her powers if you have to. My sister I entrust to you both, as best as you can manage to look after her. Make sure she marries, if she marries, someone nice. Someone she loves. Help her get away from our parents, especially our father. Do not let Dem be alone with him, ever. I'm holding you both to that.
Fondest remembrances,
Octavian.

Sweet Rebekah
What words are there to thank you for what you've done for me? You are a beautiful, lovely woman with many talents and gifts. Use them to your best advantage. You and Jonothon, and the other band members, I'm giving you X-Records. I want you to run it, and make it work. Dissolve some of this bigotry. Give mutant artists a chance. I'm also going to put you in charge of a series of homes for mutant children who are disowned, unwanted by their families, orphaned or just unable to stay with their families. Don't call the charity after me, that's all I ask. The trust fund I've set up to handle that should be enough to last for fifty or so yeares on itself for aprroximately 20 centers. Donations I'm sure you will have no problems getting. You're such a wonderful person, Bek. Be happy.
Octavian.

To my band members
It's been fantastic knowing you and making music with you. I'm giving you three and Bek X-Records. Please, please, please make sure it remains a viable business. There are accountants in place that will help you do that. Do get a replacement, I want the Displaced to become a major band, just to show what mutants can do despite the odds. Look after Jubes and Dem for me. Jono, take good care of Bek. She's priceless. You're very lucky to have her. Sergei, be good to Shannon. And Angelo, hey, there'll be someone for you one day. I'm sorry I won't be around to meet him or her, as you have excellent taste.
Looking forward to hearing the Displaced play at Number One,
Octavian.

Devon and Oz,
Thanks for the good times. Oz, be good with Willow. She is truly a beautiful lady. Devon...well. I'd say be good, but that's impossible. Hope the Dingoes go well. Or as well as you want them to.
Long life to you both,
Octavian.

Hey Jubes
I know, I'm stupid. But there are some things at work that you don't know about. Thank you for brightening my day when I was at some of my lowest ebbs. My computer is yours, along with my entertainment systm, all my nifty gadgetry you've drooled over so daintily and any CDs or records you want. The Displaced and Bobby can pick over them as well. Have fun, Jubes. Don't lose your spark.
Octavian.

Dearest Bobby,
Now, I think, I can at least write what I've wanted to say for ages, it seems like. Forever. I couldn't say it because, well, Julie. You love her. I wouldn't damage that for you. And I didn't want things to change between us either. So here it is, set out in black and white. I, Octavian Felix Edgerton-Smythe, do love one, Robert Francis Drake, with all my heart. I love you, Bobby. I always wanted to say it to your face, so many many times, but I couldn't. Because I knew you didn't love me. I didn't want to face you if I said it, and I knew you couldn't say it back. Selfish of me, really. At least I've told you now. You helped me, so much. There are just somethings you cannot help me with. I'm just...I don't want to go through it again, Bobby. I love you, but I can't stay and keeping dying inside for you. Everytime, it's like he reaches inside my heart and soul and kills me just that little bit more. I'm so tired. I just want to rest. Sleep. No dreams, hopefully. Please, look after Julie and be happy with her.
With love,
Octavian.

That done, he pushed back from the desk and went to shower, again. He'd showered in the hotel room after his father had picked him up from the tailor's where he'd been getting a suit made for various reasons. And walked out with his father's hand on his shoulder into an afternoon of hell. Clean, well, feeling cleaner then he had before, he dressed in some of his nicer clothes, before sliding his familial sword out of its sheath where it hung in the wall. He admired it for a moment, before he drew it over his wrists swiftly, feeling the pain blossom and then turn into agony as he drove it upwards through his stomach into his heart. He closed his eyes and fell down in the pool of spreading blood, knowing his healing factor wouldn't be able to stop his death and feeling strangely peaceful and content.

Logan hesitated as he walked down the corridor, scenting blood. He opened Octavian's door after he backtracked to the teen's room and paused, just taking in the sheer amount of blood that covered the floor. Then he went into action, picking him up carefully and running for the medlab, one hand steadying the sword in his gut. Droplets of blood splattered behind them, dripping off Octavian's clothes and hair and soaking Logan where he held the slim body to his own.

"HANK!"

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby looked up from the book Hank had been making him read on accounting. Why he had told his secret dream to Hank was anyone's guess. He knew Hank would make him actually do something about it.

"Oh my God, Tavvie?!"

Bobby got out of Logan and Hank's way, but still hovering in the back, watching with wide eyes and a pale face, hands clutching the book so hard they went white, and the pain was unbearable, but oh God, he had to stay, he couldn't let Tavvie...

His eyes filled with tears, and he bit his lip, wanting to do anything, but he couldn't, because he didn't know what to do. God Octavian, why?

Bobby turned and fled from the room, heading to Jono's room, just needing to see Rebekah, because she could make the pain go away. He threw the door open and fell to his knees in front of Bek.

"Bobby, what are you...?"

Rebekah took in Bobby's state quickly, and bent down to his level, murmuring soft French words of comfort.

"It hurts, Bek, please make it stop..."

"What hurts, Bobby? Tell me, please."

He opened his mouth, but couldn't speak, breathing heavily and crying.

Rebekah nodded slightly and slid into his mind, and her eyes widened, filling with tears of her own.

"Bek, it hurts..."

Rebekah kissed Bobby's forehead, and lifted him telekinetically to his feet, hugging him gently.

"Come on, we'll go to the medlabs, ok?"

Bobby nodded wordlessly.

"Jono?"

Hank, Logan & Jonothon

"Oh my stars and garters..." Hank murmured.

He started to stich up the wounds in Octavian's wrists, after inserting an IV to feed blood into the teen to replace what he had lost already. Octavian's skin was white, lips slightly blue and he was barely breathing. Then he moved onto the stomach wound.

Logan paced slightly, growling softly.

"Can you leave, Logan? You're distracting," Hank said, eyes on his work and hands steady.

Logan nodded, and left. He went to go find one of the cleaning staff to clean up the blood in Octavian's room. Though it'd probably never come out completely.

Jonothon was glancing between Bek and Bobby.

"Wot's wrong with Tav? BEcause yer acting like he's dead."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby sort of gasped and hiccupped at the same time, his head down as they went to the medlabs.

Rebekah tossed the picture at Jono, wanting to hold his hand, but she couldn't in her state, not right now.

She winced slightly as she felt a new batch of emotions hit her from Bobby and then from the medlabs. She shivered, shaking visibly.

Oh God, it hurt... Tav... please don't...

Jonothon & Hank

Jonothon blanched slightly. Then he moved to help Bek bolster her shields.

"Yer'll do no one no good if yer faint," he told her bluntly.

Hank worked, plastic gloved hands red with blood and moniters attached to Octavian blinking and beeping steadily. Then they went nuts as Octavian slipped further into shock and his heart started to skip beats. Hank stitched up a main artery and then got the paddles. Octavian's body jolted.

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby hovered fretfully, wringing his hands slightly as he watched Hank work.

"God, Tav..."

Rebekah nodded and leant against Jono from their place at the door.

Oh she didn't want to see him, she didn't want to remember him this way, if it was the end.

Jonothon & Hank

Jonothon put his arm around Bek's shoulder, brown eyes carefully blank. Bloody hell, there was so much blood...

Hank put an oxygen mask over Octavian's face and replaced the bloodbag. Then his strangely nimble fingers got to work again, repairing the hideous wound in Octavian's stomach. The sword lay forgotten to the side.

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby turned his face away, then decided to go to Octavian's room, and get some things that Tav would need when he... woke up.

He had faith in Hank, he knew that Octavian would be alright. Or at least, that's what he was telling himself.

His eyes swept over the envelopes, and he picked them up, then went about delivering them to the people they were addressed to, barely covering his grief.

Rebekah slid down the wall slightly, watching with wide eyes.

Jonothon, Jubilee & Hank

Jonothon took his letter for the bandmembers off Bobby and opened it. His eyes quickly scanned it, then he shook his head.

"Oh, Tav..."

Jubilee took her letter from Bobby and read it.

"He's right, I think he's been very, very stupid. And I'm gonna personally deliver an asskicking when he gets better for making us all scared like this."

Her eyes filled with tears.

Hank worked tirelessly, and finally managed to get Octavian into a stable state.

Rebekah and Bobby

Rebekah telekinetically opened her letter and read it, shaking slightly.

Oh...

Bobby took his letter and retreated into Hank's office, opening it with shaking hands. He read it over and then buried his head in his hands.

"Tav..." he whispered.

Hank & Jonothon

Hank stepped back from the operating table, shoulders slumped with weariness. Machines helped Octavian breathe, the teen still lost in unconsciousness as blood steadily fed into him through an IV.

"Baring further complications...I think he will be alright."

Jonothon felt a wave of relief wash over him.

"Thank God."

Bobby

Bobby burst into tears, burying his head in his hands.

Why didn't you tell me, Tav?

Hank

Hank went and washed his hands clean, changing his labcoat and taking the surgical mask off. He went to look in on Bobby, placing a blue furred paw on the teen's shoulder gently.

"Bobby..."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby turned and tried to smile at Hank, failing miserably.

Rebekah walked over to Octavian's side, sitting down next to his bed and watching his face. She looked up at Jono and bit her lip slightly.

Hank & Jonothon

Hank sighed slightly, massaging Bobby's shoulder slowly with his fingers.

"Bobby, you don't have to pretend it doesn't hurt. Because I know it does. What did he write that made you so upset?"

Jonothon went over to her, putting the letter in his pocket.

"I just wonder why, I guess...but we can ask 'im that when he wakes up. Which he will."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby looked up at Hank, and then hugged him, crying into the blue furred medico.

"He... he said he loves me."

Rebekah nodded, closing her eyes for a moment. Octavian's letter lay in her lap.

Hank & Jonothon

Hank rubbed Bobby's back gently, eyes a little misted over himself.

"Oh, Bobby, my friend..."

JOnothon rubbed her shoulder with his fingers, looking down at Octavian's still form, the machines hissing and beeping quietly.

"He gave us X-Records, in his will...we'll need to call Dem too. Told me to look after yer...and for us all to look after Jubes and Dem. He pretends to be so selfcentered..."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby's shoulders shook as he kept crying.

Rebekah let the letter float up to Jono, not able to put into words what Tav had said.

Hank & Jonothon

Hank murmured soothing words as he rubbed Bobby's back and let the teen cry over him.

"He will be alright, Bobby...and then you can discuss this with him."

Jonothon snagged it and read it.

"He must have a hell of a lot more cash then he let on..."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby nodded slightly, wiping his eyes, sniffling.

"Thanks Hanky."

Rebekah 'hmmed' and looked away from Octavian, glancing at Jono, and managing a tiny smile.

Hank & Jonothon

"What are friends for?" Hank asked gently.

"At least, I would assume this would come under things that friends would do, because I haven't actually had that many besides you."

Jonothon leant over and kissed her gently, then looked back at Octavian.

"He looks a bit better already."

Octavian seemed to be breathing steadily, and his face wasn't so white.

Bobby and Rebekah

"You're a cool blue dude, Hank," Bobby replied, wiping his eyes dry.

"And you should have lots of friends. Not just boring little me."

Rebekah kissed him back.

"Oui, that is a good sign."

Hank & Jonothon

Hank smiled slightly, then gave Bobby a tissue.

"Here."

Jonothon nodded.

"I hope he gets better quick. Do yer think...he wrote in 'is letter that 'e loved Bobby? That why 'e's so upset?"

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby blew his nose, and then just to show Hank that he'd be ok, he handed the used tissue back to him.

"No, really, Hanky, you can keep it. I know you love my snot."

Rebekah sighed.

"I think so. Not the best way for Bobby to find out, but it had to be said, I suppose."

Hank, Jonothon & Octavian

Hank grimaced slightly and threw the used tissue into the bin.

"Quite, Bobby."

Jonothon kissed her again softly.

"He really thought it out though, that's the scary thing. Letters and everything."

Octavian breathed in deeply and his eyes flickered.

"Hank, I think he's waking up!"

Hank patted Bobby's back again, then went to attend to his patient.

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby dumped his tissue in the bin, and followed Hank out.

"Hmmm," Rebekah replied, nodding.

"Hank didn't want my snot," Bobby announced, pushing his emotions to the side, pretending he was ok.

"Why would he?" Rebekah asked.

"Because it's yummy."

Hank, Jonothon & Octavian

Hank shook his head slightly and checked the moniters. All showed normal signals. He lifted Octavian's wrist to check on the healing and decided that he could probably take the stitches out soon.

"Bobby, yer disgusting."

Jonothon shook his head.

Octavian's eyes opened slowly and he blinked tiredly, sucking in air through the oxygen mask.

"Welcome back, Octavian," Hank said gently.

Octavian stared at him, then closed his eyes, tears making their way down his cheeks silently. He was meant to have died, he wanted to be dead. Couldn't they just let him make that choice? He felt an overwhelming sense of betrayal that they'd forced him to live longer.

Bobby and Rebekah

"Hey, you," Bobby said softly, looking at Octavian.

"And shh, Jono, my snot is very nutritious. Ask Hank."

Rebekah wrinkled her nose slightly.

Hank, Jonothon & Octavian

"Shush, Bobby," Hank said distractedly.

"And don't talk like that, it is quite unsettling."

"Absolutely barking, yer are, Bobby. Hey, mate," Jonothon said to Octavian.

Octavian kept his eyes closed. They'd read the letters he knew it...

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby laughed softly, and touched Octavian's cheek.

"Tav."

Rebekah focused for a moment.

"Octavian, do you want us to go or stay?" she asked privately.

Octavian & Hank

Octavian's breath hitched softly in his chest, quietly despairing.

Hank took the oxygen mask away gently.

"You can talk, you realise," Hank said quietly.

Octavian opened his eyes and swallowed.

"Can I have a glass of water, please?"

Hank nodded and moved off to get one.

Bobby and Rebekah

"He speaks. He guess what, Tav, Hank ate my snot," Bobby said, nodding.

"He did not," Rebekah replied.

"Don't listen to the American. He's insane."

"Hey, I didn't eat my snot, Hank did. He's the insane one."

Hank, Jonothon & Octavian

"I did not consume any of Bobby's nasal mucous, in any fashion," Hank said patiently as he came back to the bed.

"Doctor speak is rather nasty," Jonothon noted.

Hank helped Octavian sip from the water, and then Octavian looked at them all, eyes blue smudges of hurt and fatigue.

"Why didn't you let me die?"

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby wiped his eyes again.

"Because we love you too much," Rebekah said softly, looking into Octavian's eyes.

Octavian & Hank

"Then just let me f*cking go," Octavian said in a weary voice.

"Not very likely to happen," Hank said gently.

"You're a doctor, Hank, I expect you to do your doctor thing. Hypocratic oath and all that," Octavian said.

"When I slit my wrists, and then drive a sword into my stomach, angling it towards my heart, I would expect that was a pretty clear statement of my wishes, don't you?"

Bobby and Rebekah

"Tav, man, we care. Which is why we can't let you go. Selfish, yes, but we love you too much," Bobby said.

Rebekah bit her lip slightly.

Octavian

"Bobby, you don't love me, you never will and I'm very tired of living and I want to die," Octavian said slowly.

"I'm sick of this."

Bobby and Rebekah

"You know, you don't have to believe me, but it's true."

Bobby sighed slightly.

Rebekah looked at Jono helplessly.

Octavian & Jonothon

"Don't you dare," Octavian said in a low voice.

"The only reason you're saying it is that you think that maybe this way, I won't finish this properly. Don't you dare, Bobby."

"Ever think that maybe 'e's telling the truth?" Jonothon said.

Octavian yelped a queer bitter laugh, then put his hand on his stomach, grimacing with pain.

"Highly unlikely."

Bobby and Rebekah

"Don't you think I can tell the truth or something," Bobby asked.

Rebekah leant against Jono.

Octavian

Octavian shook his head.

"You can tell the truth, I know, Bobby. But you don't love me."

Bobby

"If that helps you sleep at night, believe that."

Bobby shook his head and went into Hank's office.

Jonothon, Octavian & Hank

Jonothon stared at Octavian, who had closed his eyes again. Humming something under his breath. "Yer really stubborn sometimes."

Octavian breathed carefully through the pain.

"Perhaps. Or maybe I'm the one speaking the truth, while Bobby's being softhearted. And it would be so easy..."

Hank turned and followed his friend into the office, closing the door behind him.

"Bobby? Are you alright?"

Jonothon wanted to shake Octavian.

"Yer such a coward, Octavian. I thought yer more then this."

"Go *away*, Jono. I'll be able to bear your sermonising much better once I've healed a bit more."

Octavian lifted his hands and picked fretfully at the stitches on one wrist.

"You'd think, once it was seen I wasn't going to die you wouldn't have read the letters. Then Bobby wouldn't be trying to be so kind."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby shrugged slightly.

"If he doesn't want to believe me, then I can't change that."

Rebekah looked at Octavian and shook her head.

"Octavian, just because he doesn't love you the way you want him too, doesn't mean he doesn't love you with everything that he has."

Hank & Octavian

Hank touched his shoulder gently.

"Maybe because he believes he isn't worthy. That it is impossible that you could. I know I did not believe you would seek me out for friendship, but you did."

"Eros, Platos, yes, he loves me like that," Octavian said, fingers clutching at the sheets.

"What I want...no, what I *need* he can't give me. Don't you think I know how *stupid* it was of me to fall in love with someone who already loved someone else? Don't you think I haven't castigated myself for it? Rest assured Bek, if I could choose, I wouldn't love anyone at all. All it does is hurt."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby looked at Hank with surprised eyes.

"Why are you so smart, Hank?"

Rebekah shook her head, stamping her foot.

"Why does no one listen to the empath? Maybe he doesn't know how he feels, or he won't admit it, but *I* know. And dammit, Octavian, you are being stupid. But not because you love him, but because you won't believe he may actually love you back."

She got up and left the medlabs, temper flaring.

Hank, Jonothon & Octavian

Hank shrugged slightly.

"Perhaps it comes from merely observing the participants in this occurence called life. Nevertheless, there is a darkness lurking beneath Octavian's constant gaiety. I think you know what I am referring to, and I believe you may also know its cause. I may be more concentrated in the physical aspects of science then then the pyschological but even I know a coping mechanism when I see one."

Jonothon stared at Octavian for a moment, then turned on his heel to run after Bek.

"Luv!"

"Ah, but who could truly love a whore, Bek?" Octavian whispered.

"I'm tainted. Dirty. He can't love me, I'll ruin him."

Bobby and Rebekah

"I don't know how to help him anymore," Bobby said softly.

Rebekah turned around and looked at Jono.

"I'm ok, just frustrated."

Hank & Jonothon

"Persistance?" Hank suggested.

"He may love you, but I don't think you quite have his trust that you won't hurt him. And so far, I think Octavian has been hurt more then we realise. Something in his eyes..."

The doctor shook his head.

"Reminds me of a dog I rescued once, when I was a young boy. It had been...cruelly mistreated. Sadistically, even. All it would do was sit and shiver, and always, always looking for a sign it was going to be hurt again, but trying so very hard to appease whoever approached it so it wouldn't be hurt again. I gained the dog's trust, but it did take a very long time. And humans remember more so then animals. If you really love him, you will have your work cut out for you. And if you don't love him enough...tell him so, and let him heal and move on."

Jonothon nodded and hugged her gently.

"Luv yer. He's just being a twat."

Bobby and Rebekah

"I don't even know anymore, Hank."

Bobby looked at his hands.

Rebekah hugged him back.

"I love you too."

Hank & Jonothon

"Is he worth it?" Hank asked gently.

"That's really the question you must ask yourself. Can you persevere to earn his trust that you do in actual fact love him? Because I believe he sincerely loves you."

Jonothon kissed her cheek.

"Even if Tav's being an idiot...if Bobby 'urts him anymore..."

Bobby and Rebekah

"He is, but... you know, it's complicated. There's Julie as well."

Bobby shrugged.

"I almost wish I didn't know."

Rebekah nodded and led him to the caf.

"I do not think zat Bobby realises he does it, 'alf the time."

Hank & Jonothon

"Which would be precisely the reason he wasn't going to tell you," Hank said.

"He only told you when he was sure he was going to die, and not have to face your reaction. Now if you will excuse me, Bobby, I better check on my patiend and ensure he hasn't sneaked out of the medlab. Because we know Octavian's extreme fondness for my company and medical accourtrements in general."

"He's just so fecking clueless," Jonothon said.

"Tav is *such* an idiot ter fall in luv with Bobby. Wot he needs, Bobby can't give 'im and never can."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby nodded and decided to remain in Hank's office for a little longer.

Rebekah nodded, and floated a plate of food over to herself at the table in the caf.

"Maybe if Julie was not around," she said.

Hank, Octavian & JOnothon

Hank sighed slightly and went back into the main room of the medlabs. Octavian had his legs over the edge of the bed and was currently engaged in sliding the IV needles out of his arm.

"Return to your bed at once," Hank snapped, very close to being truly angry.

"Go away."

Octavian ripped the last IV needle out of his arm and ran for the door. Hank growled in frustration.

"A recalcitrant patient is not something I need! Come back here at *once*!"

"Mebbe. I don't think Bobby has it in him, though."

Jonothon shrugged slightly.

"Bobby's a nice guy and all, but he's pretty damn shallow and doesn't have that much of a backbone."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby looked over at the book Hank had given him, and flipped through the pages.

He decided right then, that he wasn't going to act like anything had changed. He was going to focus on going to uni.

Rebekah nodded slightly.

"Hmmm."

Octavian, Hank & Jonothon

Octavian cut through the cafeteria and jumped a table fluidly, bloodsoaked pants clinging to his legs. An irate Hank chased after him.

"Well, that's something yer don't see everyday," Jonothon commented to Bek as Octavian, despite Hank's demands that he return to medical care and the obvious pain he was in, climbed nimbly out a window and upwards, presumably to the roof. Hank growled at that, an almost animal sound, and loped to the door that would take him outside.

Rebekah

Rebekah raised an eyebrow slightly.

"Should I go talk to him, maybe?"

Jonothon

"I'm sure it will resolve itself," Jonothon said.

"Five bucks says Hank frogmarches Octavian back down into the labs in ten minutes."

Rebekah

Rebekah managed a weak smile, and looked at her hands, the faded scars on her wrists from her own attempt.

Jonothon, Octavian & Hank

"See, here they come," Jonothon said.

Octavian was marched past the door that lead to the corridor, Hank's heavy blue paw on his shoulder.

"Cease and desist, doctor," Octavian said.

"Bed, now," Hank ordered.

"Despite your advanced healing factor, you are not the Wolverine and you do require additional care."

"I'm *fine*! Let me go!"

Rebekah

Rebekah laughed slightly as she finished her dinner.

"Oh dear. Anyway, I need your help with a song. Have a moment?"

Jonothon, Octavian & Hank

"Always fer yer, luv."

Jonothon leant over and kissed her cheek.

Octavian protested loudly all the way down to the medlabs, Hank's nerves drawing tighter with every demand that he let the teen go his own merry way. When they got to the medlab, he put Octavian forciably on a bed and locked the doors.

"Now, *stay*."

"I'm not some sort of dog you can call to heel!"

"You will stay there until I deem your body healed enough to let you go."

Hank's eyes caught the metallic glimmer of the sword that had been forced through Octavian's stomach and he picked it up.

"Do not force me to restrain you, Mr Edgerton-Smythe."

"If you just let me leave, you wouldn't have a reason to!"

Octavian's voice was quite loud. Hank rubbed his forehead wearily as he went into his office, placing the bloodstained sword gingerly on a shelf and then getting some painkillers for his increasing headache. The sword's blade gleamed in deadly edges where it wasn't dulled with Octavian's blood.

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby patted Hank's shoulder absently, and still holding his book, he went out to see Octavian.

Rebekah smiled and got up.

"I wrote... well, kinda, some notes down, but I can't actually play, so I don't know what it'll sound like..."

Octavian & Jonothon

Octavian lay on the bed and when he noticed Bobby come in, turned away, curling in on himself. He closed his eyes, feeling tears prick at his eyelids.

Be strong. Don't break.

Jonothon nodded.

"I can play fer yer."

Bobby and Rebekah

"You don't have to hide from me," Bobby said softly.

"The truth is, Tav, I don't know what to do."

Rebekah smiled and they headed up to Jono's room.

She floated the paper with the notes over to Jono.

Octavian

Octavian nodded slightly, still keeping his face hidden.

"That's why I didn't want you to know. I came home from a little meeting with my father today and I had a moment of epiphany. I wanted you to know if I was dead...that I...loved you."

Jonothon read through them, then picked up his guitar and played it through.

Bobby and Rebekah

"It's complicated, isn't it?" Bobby said, sitting down near Octavian's bed.

"If I'd known before Julie, things may be different. But... now... I mean, Julie and I... we're complicated too."

Rebekah frowned slightly, listening to it.

"Can you make that last chord a g?"

Octavian & Jonothon

Octavian buried his face in the pillow, shoulders taught with misery.

"I didn't fall in love with you until just a few months ago."

Jonothon replayed it, altering it as she wished.

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby nodded slightly.

"Tav, I don't want to hurt you. And that's all I've seemed to do during the last few months."

Rebekah hummed along to the tune.

"Ah oui, merci Jono."

Octavian & Jonothon

Octavian swallowed against the knot of pain in his throat.

"I'm a fool, Bobby. The reason I didn't want you to know was precisely what is happening now. God, I'm so stupid..."

Jonoton smiled.

"Anything to help a lady."

Bobby and Rebekah

"Do you... do you want me to not be here?" Bobby asked.

Rebekah leant over and kissed him softly.

"Do you think... zat what we were shown the other day, of our future... it will 'appen?"

Octavian & Jonothon

"As always Bobby, I am grateful for any time you spare," Octavian said in a dulled tone.

God, it hurt so much.

"God, I hope so," Jonothon said.

"It was nice..."

Bobby and Rebekah

"I don't..."

Bobby sighed slightly, thinking that perhaps Octavian couldn't even stand to be in the same room with him now that he knew.

He wanted to be there, but not if Tav was going to hide from him.

Rebekah nodded.

"We're very nice though. But our baby was..."

She smiled slightly.

Octavian & JOnothon

God, he wanted to kiss him...so much.

Octavian breathed in a shuddering breath, that alone revealing how close he was to tears. He got up from his curled in position and rubbed a hand wearily over his face, eyes looking older then they should. The black stiching on his wrists stood out starkly, pale skin flecked slightly with blood.

"Gorgeuos. Sure she was mine?" Jonothon said.

Bobby and Rebekah

"Do you need anything?" Bobby asked softly.

"I can get Hank if you..."

Rebekah nodded.

"Pretty sure. Oh she could be that other Jono's, but I'm sure that she was yours."

Octavian & Jonothon

Octavian looked up at Bobby, then leant forward slightly to kiss him.

"Bobby..."

Jonothon chuckled.

"Yeah."

Bobby and Rebekah

Bobby kissed Octavian back gently.

Rebekah leant against Jono, floating his guitar away.

"Think our baby will be as beautiful?"

Octavian & Jonothon

Octavian sighed into Bobby's mouth before drawing away.

"Today was a particularily nasty paternal visit."

"Yeah, course!" Jonothon said.

"Luv yer, pet."

Bobby and Rebekah

"Aren't they always? What happened?"

Bobby sat down on a nearbye bed, placing the bookmark in Hank's book and played with the fringing of the bookmark as he listened.

Rebekah looked sad for a moment, then kissed Jono gently.

"Love you too."

Octavian & Jonothon

"Mostly usual..."

Octavian stretched back slightly, hand rubbing across the still tenderly sore skin of his stomach.

"And then he decided to take advantage of my quickly healing nature."

He closed his eyes for a moment.

"He cut my chest open, ejaculated onto the wound and then let it heal over. God, I still feel dirty...and I came home and cut it open again to get the filth out."

Jonothon leant over to snatch a quick kiss.

"More music?"

Bobby and Rebekah

"Maybe you should let Hank look at it," Bobby said, looking disgusted.

"There could be infection or something."

Rebekah nodded.

"Play me something, s'il vous plait?"

Octavian & Jonothon

"No, I don't have a problem with infection," Octavian said.

"If I did, the sword I stabbed through my stomach would have finished me off with an infection, despite Hank's surgery."

Jonothon nodded and leant over his guitar as he started to play.

"I'm sitting in the railway station.
Got a ticket to my destination.
On a tour of one-night stands my suitcase and guitar in hand.
And ev'ry stop is neatly planned for a poet and a one-man band.
Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.

Ev'ry day's an endless stream
Of cigarettes and magazines.
And each town looks the same to me, the movies and the factories
And ev'ry stranger's face I see reminds me that I long to be,
Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.

Tonight I'll sing my songs again,
I'll play the game and pretend.
But all my words come back to me in shades of mediocrity
Like emptiness in harmony I need someone to comfort me.
Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.
Silently for me..."

OOC: Homeward Bound by Simon & Garfunkel