Fred opened the envelope, and pulled out its contents.
“It’s an invitation to a ball,” Fred replied. “I guess -”
But before Fred could finish his sentence, he and his brothers abruptly appeared in the ballroom. There were princes, princesses, and their servants and guards everywhere.
“It’s about time you guys showed up,” said one of the nearby princesses.
“Who are you?” asked Fred. ‘Where are we?”
“It’s the ball silly,” she replied, pointing to the invitation with her staff.
Fred stared at it dumbly for a moment.
“Oh!”
She laughed.
“You are Prince Fred, right?” she went on when he nodded. “Well, I’m Princess Joy. I’m also your daughter, Isaac. I’m also half your oldest sons’ wife.”
“What?” Isaac asked, staring.
“Oh, this isn’t the only universe I’ve lived in.”
“So do you like, know The Narrator then?” asked Zac.
“Heck, yeah.”
“Then could you tell her to leave us alone and let us go home?”
“Heck, no.”
“Why not?”
“Because.”
“Because why?”
“I don’t know what she was thinking - making you so argumentative.”
“She did not! I’ve always been like this!”
“Oh yeah? Tell me, do you remember anything beyond Chapter 1?”
“Chapter 1? That’s stupid. Real life isn’t made up of chapters!”
“Since when was this real life? Come on, it’s a simple question. Can you remember anything before the last day that you guys practiced?”
Zac glared, then thought hard.
“See? You can’t, can you.”
“Shut up.”
“Hang on,” Taylor cut in. “Should you be telling us this? We wouldn’t have even known there was a narrator if Captain Hanson didn’t tell us - and he wasn’t supposed to!”
“She might be my twin sister, separated at life, but she has really bad grammar sometimes and she won’t let me marry Fred.”
“Wouldn’t that be a bit incestuous?” asked Isaac. “I mean, you did just say that you’re my daughter, and my sons’ wife, and that’s bad enough, but to marry my brother as well…”
“Half your sons’ wife,” Princess Joy corrected.
“That would also make it bigamy, wouldn’t it?” asked Taylor.
“Oh, shut up, before I give you a sex change like I did in another dimension.”
“Been there done that,” Isaac laughed. “Didn’t you read Chapter 12? Oh drat, I’m doing the chapter thing now…”
“How would you like me to turn you into a rabbit with three extra tails and sell you to a freak show?”
“You can’t do that.”
“I can so. I’m an enchantress. The Princess of Magic. I can do whatever I want.”
“Except marry Fred,” Zac replied. “Why would you want to anyway? I mean… he’s Fred!”
“Oh my gosh! It’s Prince Fred!” squealed a nearby princess.
The squeal affected other princesses, and for the first time in his life, Fred got mobbed. Joy decided that she didn’t like being trampled on and teleported out of the way… and into Heath Ledger’s lap.
“Hey big boy,” she said. “You don’t mind my dropping in?”
“Nope, never.”
And so Princess Joy and Prince Heath Ledger started smooching, completely obvious to Fred’s cries of help from the hordes of princesses trying to convince him to marry her using every means necessary. Every means.